“There's an old Italian saying: you f*ck up once, you lose two teeth.” - Tony Soprano

yesterday somebody died who i felt was almost part of my family. james gandolfini AKA tony soprano genuinely had the biggest impact on me of any other tv character before or since. the sopranos perfectly encapsulated 21st century living and I was hooked from the first time I saw those hunched shoulders and heard that heavy breathing that defined the man himself, T. not exactly a likeable or particularly charming guy, but the one thing tony had was that he was knowable. i really felt as though i knew him and so the death of the genius who played him has been a shock.

i spent about 6 months watching the sopranos and i regard it as a turning point in my life. it taught me some life skills. i felt like i grew with the characters, if they were moody, i was moody. and no one could do moody better than tony. he was so well played by gandolfini, all he had to do was throw a look or breathe differently and it would change the whole atmosphere of the episode. i liked the way he’d have a conversation with himself in therapy, muttering his frustrations away. he was very vulnerable in that psychiatric chair yet he kept at it because he needed the release, and the sexual tension between him and dr melfi was undeniable and addictive.

in many ways tony was just your average family man. difficult kids, high maintenance but desperately loyal wife and a secondary family that extended amongst his friends and “colleagues”. the episodes where he found out that Vito was gay were particularly poignant for me as it was apparent tony had evolved beyond his usual tough guy reflexes. he showed a tolerance towards his choice when others wanted him whacked. it was these times that he hinted at a softer side. a human side.

i could literally go on forever about my favourite scenes, episodes and tony-isms but this isn't really what this post is for. there were many up’s, many downs, many meals and many mithers for tony during the six series that The Sopranos ran. and if you haven’t watched it, you should. it completely changed the dynamic of tv shows to come and james gandolfini became the HBO king with his portrayal of tony. never has a man worn vests and cheap polyester so well.

RIP.